I could devote a whole blog to spooky hotties, but this time around I'm talking about Elvira. Ah, Elvira. That luscious horror queen of the 80s. There are certain women that when you think of them your brain is pretty much reduced to this...
Anyway, on with the movie. Elvira quits her job as a movie hostess after the new station owner demands she sleep with him to keep her job. Immediately following this her great aunt Morgana dies and she must attend the reading of the will. She rolls into town causing mayhem and destruction along the way. The town of Fallwell reminds me of Hill Valley circa 1955. She's been in town all of five minutes and has already rocked their feeble little world.
Forced to stick around when her car dies she tries to find some fun at the bowling alley. She meets a couple of jerks, one of which is Jeff Conaway best know for his roles on Taxi and Babylon 5. We know Jeff Conaway's character is a jerk the moment he rips up an issue of Amazing Spider-Man. A handsome stranger comes to her rescue and informs her that the town is ran by a couple of squares who refuse to let the town have any fun. Later, at the reading of the will, we meet Vincent Talbot. His name is a reference to the classic horror character, Larwence Talbot aka the Wolf Man played by Lon Chaney...and legendary actor Vincent Price. Vincent Talbot is played by William Morgan Sheppard...who has been in a slue of movies... but you may remember him best from his appearances on Star Trek. He was the Klingon Commandant of Rura Penthe in Star Trek VI and the Vulcan Science Minister in Star Trek (2009) who poo pooed Spock.
Elvira receives an old house, a poodle and a book...a book that Talbot desperately wants. Elvira visits her new home, which looks like the Munsters house. Talbot shows up to buy the book but her new poodle has hidden it...for some reason. Later that night some kids sneak up to her room and pull a George McFly. Is it just me or did a lot of 80s movies involve peeping toms?
Next day the boys return and help fix up her house. Meanwhile, the town council decides to do anything and everything to get Elvira out of town. After no one shows up to buy her house and she is unable to find a job handsome stranger informs her the town is against her. She decides to show some of her B-Movies at his theater to bring in business and we learn that Talbot is a spooky warlock.
When Elvira learns the teenagers are a bunch of scaredy cat squares she inspires them to rebel against the rules. Now, this next scene is important cause it's my favorite. Pay attention cause it's likely to be your favorite scene too.
...Uh...where was I? Oh, the review! Following that she scrubs all the paint off and manages to get some alone time with handsome stranger. She finds the book that Talbot has been looking for and, thinking it's a cookbook, prepairs a casserole. As she opens the pot a monster jumps out and attacks. They manage to get it in the garbage disposal and well...dispose of it.
The poodle steals the book, runs into the attic with it and they discover a trunk full of magic stuff. A letter from her aunt reveals that Elvira's mother and aunt were witches and that she also has power. After fooling around with a spell she fools around with handsome stranger. Next day the town hold a morality picnic and Elvira serves her monster casserole. Everyone eats it and they...get horny.
Later the town holds a meeting and Talbot convinces them to arrest Elvira on charges of witchcraft. Much later they tie her to a stake and attempt to burn her. She has a flashback, uses her magic ring and causes it to rain. She makes kissy face with handsome stranger and he informs her Talbot has the book. They have a rather lengthy, but good battle. In the end she manages to destroy him with her magic ring and escapes from her burning mansion. The townsfolk show up and instead of running her out of town are there to make amends. The movie ends with the Vegas show Elvira has always dreamed of.
Ah, Elvira. I miss the days of the horror movie host. My childhood was filled with Elvira, Al Lewis (Grandpa Munster) and Jo Bob Brigs of MonsterVision presenting me with a seemingly endless supply of movies. Some were bad, some were good…but the host always made it fun.
Elvira didn’t go over so well at home. I can clearly remember my mom asking me ‘What are you watching?!’ Well, not so much asking but demanding. That wasn’t the end of Elvira though. When mom wasn’t home dad and I would watch. I couldn’t see the harm in her. She was just presenting movies.
If you didn't grow up in the 80s or early 90s you may be asking yourself, 'What is the big deal?' Hopefully this review has convinced you to check out her movie. Its a goofy, campy, tongue in cheek romp. Its full of 'so bad they're good' jokes. They put Elvira's er...goods, on display of course and also poke some fun. It's one of those movies you can't help but smile at as you watch. I'd even go so far as to say it is one of my favorite 80s movies.
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